Tuesday 7/13

Better Names

Sometimes, the names we use for things really miss the mark, don’t they?  They should invite more people to these imaginary naming conventions because I think, collectively, we could do a lot better.  Here are a few examples among the thousands upon thousands out there:

Name is:                                 Name should be:

Rubber Cement                     Rubber Glue

-There’s nothing “cement-y” about it.  It’s just rubbery.

Peanut Butter                        Peanut Spread

-Butter?  Last time I checked, peanuts don’t come from cows.

Cursive                                   Socially acceptable sloppiness

-They should stop making kids learn cursive in elementary school and just move the curriculum to med school.

Refried Beans                        Mashed beans

-They’re not even fried once.  I mean, come on…

Highlighter                             Yellow marker

-I’m just calling it how I see it.

Sport Utility Vehicle              Utility Vehicle

-Bottom line: not sporty.  Maybe they should try “Small” utility vehicle.

By: S. Cole Garrett