Express Mail

Express Mail


No themed week this week.  I've taken a few funny pictures I'd like to share, as well as some screen shots I've taken from my favorite news sources.

I took this picture outside of our local post office:

That is a trash can.  In case you can't read it, it says "Express Mail: Next Day Service."  I've tried to figure this out in my head over and over, but I can't.  Why the heck would they label a trash can with an express mail advertisement?  I wonder how much mail has been literally dumped over the years.  I'm guessing the post-office-budget-committee-circa-1972 discussion went something like this:

Director:     "Johnson!  How do we cut costs?  The feds are breathing down our necks!"
Johnson:     "Um, let's see. . . "
Director:     "I don't have all day, Johnson.  Make it snappy!"
Johnson:     "Well, um, we could make the trash cans look like drop boxes."
Director:     "Hmm. . . I like your thinking."
Johnson:     "Thank you, sir."
Director:     "Get someone on it.  Now what do we do about the agonizingly long wait times?"

Wedding Week: Thursday

The dress is a BIG DEAL.  Brides go crazy over their dress.  They watch wedding dress shows.  They read wedding magazines (mainly just to look at the dresses).  They scour wedding websites for dress ideas.  I'll bet if there was a wedding radio station, brides would listen to that, too!  Dress, dress, dress, dress.

None of the obsession really bothers me.  I'm just making an observation.  All of the wedding dress hoopla is actually funny.  Let me give you the basic outline of what happens:

Bride:     I'm going with my mom to look at wedding dresses.
Groom:  Oh, okay.
Bride:     It's not like we're going to find anything.  We're just looking.
Groom:  Sure.  (Sarcastically)
Bride:     Oh stop.  We'll probably look at ten places before I find one.
Groom:  Mm hm.  (Again, sarcastically.)

. . . 6 hours later . .  .

Bride:     Oh . . .
Bride:     My . . .
Bride:     Gosh!  I found it!  I found the one!  It's the one I've always dreamed of!
Groom:   I know . . .
Bride:     What do you mean, 'you know'?  I LOVE this one!  This is the one!  (Dances off into other room...)
Groom:   Never mind.

And it costs a pretty penny, too.  Couples could save a whole bunch of money if they would just buy their dresses here:

They may not have wedding magazines, but they definitely sell other magazines.  :)

Wedding Week: Wednesday

This next bit came to us while scouring the internet for examples to pull from to write our order of ceremonies.  This was seriously at the bottom of one of the articles we were looking through for opening greetings:

All of the article suggestions are funny in their own way, but the circled one is the best.  My wife to be and I almost died laughing when we saw this.  I hope you get a kick out of it, too.

Do you have any funny stories about looking for one thing online, and being pointed to a funny recommended site/article?  :)