Hot Bod

Might as well get all of my animal kicks out of my system this week.  

Have a great weekend!

Na Na Na

I'm embarrassed to say how long it took me to get this picture . . .

 . . . but it was worth it when I did, lol!

Good Drill

I love a clever ad...

Butter Special

No wonder it's on sale, lol!

Lost in Translation

Well, they get an "A" for effort!

Crappy Investment

I keep getting this advertisement in my mailbox:

Just say it a few times and listen to how you naturally emphasize the word . . . investools.

Watch Your Bell

I saw this one in the Taco Bell drive through . . . well . . . obviously.

I love corporate humor.  Well played.  :)

Bloody Corn

What kind of pictures make you want food?

Is it fresh, water-dewed produce?

Or is it something more like a sizzling steak?

Or some other vice?

Well, we were going through the drive through at KFC (this isn't the first post about KFC . . .this is) and we saw an interesting sign.  The sign was a picture of the types of food they serve, but in a modern artistic style.  Here is some appetizing corn we saw:

That's no mistake.  There's nothing accidentally splattered on that picture.  That's the picture.  So I have to ask: how does bloody corn make you feel?  Does bloody corn make you hungry or does it make you want to murder other vegetables?  

I know one thing, I might change my order at the window after seeing this.  How about one of those famous bowls?  On second thought, I'll take bloody corn.

Sample

Some billboards are funny because of their ignorance.  Others are made so to be clever.  I'm pretty sure IKEA was being clever with this one:

Bing Fail

I already don't like Bing.  Then I saw this clip.

Microsoft is wasting exorbitant amounts of money promoting Bing, including bad product placements.  Why even fight Google?  Microsoft would probably be better off spending all that money on figuring out time travel.  Then, they could go back and create "Moogle" before Google.  Just a thought . . .

In case you can't see that video, this is the link: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfHuZ5qrYX4&feature=player_embedded

Funeral Fail

Product failures are funny, but it's not the only thing businesses tend to get wrong.  Advertisers can miss their mark, too . . .

Magic Fail

Hmm . . . well, look at the picture first, then we'll talk (even though it probably isn't necessary, lol.):

Now think back to 1992, which is around the time this Ken hit the shelves.  What sort of words come to mind when you think "purple leather jacket," "mesh pink shirt," and "blond highlighted hair"?  Is heterosexual one of them?  Doubtful.  It's quite the opposite, really.  

This case is interesting for one reason.  Earring Magic Ken was the best-selling Ken doll to date and they discontinued it.  Why?  Because little girls weren't the ones buying them up!  And when a newspaper in Washington revealed who was buying them and what the chrome circle dangler around his neck looked like, Matel decided to pull the plug.

Water Fail

Blogger was down last Thrusday afternoon and Friday most of the day . . . soooooo . . . no post last Friday.  Bummer, I know!  I'm going to continue on this week with a few more examples of product failures that you may or may not remember.

Coors is an interesting case because the product failure below almost makes sense.  Back in the late 80's, Coors decided to start selling bottled water:

Pretty clever, right?  Coors is made from Rocky Mountain spring water, right?  Surely, if it's good enough to make beer out of, it's good enough to drink straight!  I'll be honest, I would've tried it once.  

Here's the rub, though.  There's no alcohol.  When your loyal customer base consists entirely of consumers who consume alcohol, you're really setting yourself up for disappointment with bottled water.  Coors bottled water is missing the key ingredient they build their brand on: booze!  

This would be like Budwiser selling frog legs . . . 

or Fat Tire selling bicycles . . .

or Shiner selling pet goats . . .

It's hard to put your finger on what's wrong with Coors water.  It just failed miserably.  It begs the same question as the last few posts: how did this one slip through the cracks?

This one was over 20 years ago, but it's still worth a good laugh.

Produce Fail

Today's post is rather short for two reasons:

1)  I'm kind of pinched for time due to working way more than usual this week.

2)  Honestly, this product only really needs one word:

Why?

Toothpaste Fail

Here's another brand failure that many people missed.  Take a look at this picture:

Mmmmm... Delicious looking stir fry!  Broccoli . . . snow peas . . . yellow peppers, red peppers . . .water chestnuts (one of my personal faves!)  It's kind of starting to make me hungry.  But wait.  There's more to the picture (there's always more . . .)

Let's see if I can use a story to describe why this tasty-looking entree failed so miserably:

You're walking down the aisle one day in the freezer section at the store and you're looking for supper, thinking out loud:

"Hum dee dum . . . la la la . . . let's see.  What looks good?

 . . . Stover's meat loaf?  Maybe . . .

 . . . Banquet Chicken Pot Pie?  Not today . . .

. . . Marie Calender's Mac 'n' Cheese?  Um . . ."

And then you stop, turn your head, and scrunch your eyebrows:

"What the . . . Colgate Stir Fry?!"

If that sounds remotely close to your reaction to the prospect of Colgate frozen dinners, then join the club.  This product was yanked from the shelves after only weeks of baffled shoppers got a look at it.  No one could get past the "Colgate."  

Blind taste tests of this dish probably went fabulously.  The problem is, the researchers didn't tell the testers they were eating Colgate food. . . . Colgate food.  Even if it is great, the name kills it.  Apparently, Colgate ran out of things to sell on the dental hygiene aisle.  I'm all for branching out into new categories, but not that far out.

Cheese Fail

Do you know why we have focus groups?  It's so that companies can get real consumer opinions about new products before releasing them to the general public.  Unfortunately, some products manage to slip through the cracks.  It never ceases to amaze me how some of them actually do.  I thought I'd spend a few days or so highlighting some of the worst product failures.  Some of them are so ridiculous, you can't help but laugh.

No doubt, Cheetos are a great success!  Kids love them and adults who aren't ashamed to like their fingers in public like them, too.  Even spicy Cheetos are a big hit.  There are also Cheetos puffs, Cheetos asteroids, and . . . Cheetos lip balm?!

If only this were a joke!  Believe it or not, Cheetos made a lip-smacking-good lip balm.  I don't know about you, but for one, orange lips aren't attractive.  And two, who in the world would want to kiss someone with pasty, Cheeto-flavored lips?  Not me.  

How did this one slip through the cracks?

Not the Best

I took this picture on the way home from work a few weeks ago:

I'm a big believer that honesty is the best policy.  But when it comes to promoting your business, well, perhaps another policy would be better.  

Funny Restaurant Sign Week 1

Welcome to Funny Restaurant Sign week.  I asked for a few suggestions a while back about some themed weeks I could post about.  (If this isn't the idea you suggested, don't worry, it'll probably be soon).  So here's the first one for the week!

I'd like to break the ice with this sign.  It isn't a huge pylon outside that gets you to come into the restaurant.  You would see this one once you got inside:

Gotta keep those cockroaches healthy, too!  Who else is going to clean your toothbrush while you sleep?

OK

OK


I've always laughed at funny and/or ignorant signs.  This one made me laugh today.  :)

We all appreciate the honesty, but I think they'd be better off letting the patrons be their own judge.

Musical Liberty

Musical Liberty


Here at Dry Humor Daily, I like Christmas music.  I really do.  I prefer the older songs, but some of the new ones aren't so bad.  (You definitely have to skip over whatever came out in the 90s, though, hands down.)  Want to know what I don't like?  I don't like despise commercials which rewrite the lyrics to Christmas songs with words about crowded malls, nasty fruit cake, and unwelcome in-laws.  I wish I could explain it, but it simply annoys me to no end.  (Even writing about this makes me shake my head in disappointment at our creatively lacking advertising industry.)

Companies have been altering Christmas songs for years, but Garmin's versions a few holidays ago really tipped the scales.  Now, any company can pitch Garmin's success as reason enough to make their own cheesy version of the campaign.  Here's an example of one:



I have a question.  Does anyone know the actual words to Carol of the Bells?  (Better yet, I wonder how many people even know the name.)  Everyone I know just says the "merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas.  Merry, merry, merry, merry Christmas" part when it comes on.  (Oh, who am I kidding, that's just about all I can remember from year to year, too...)

Bottom line: companies should have their commercial privileges unceremoniously stripped once they head down this path.  Changing the words of Christmas songs is lame.  (Even if they are funny the first time around.)  End of story.

On a lighter note, thanks to all of you loyal readers and comment-leavers!  I appreciate your time and interest more than you know.  Just thought I would randomly mention that.  :)