Skeptic

There's a skeptic in every bunch.

You Pick

Which one doesn't belong?

"H"

Hence why we NEVER let the kids sleep in our bed, lol.

Have a great weekend!

Fun at the Zoo

Someone doesn't like pictures......

Privacy

What's there to hide, anyway?  Lol

And Counting...

Cancer, shmancer....

Fatty

I usually don't do cute/funny animals, but this just made me laugh out loud!

Tough Call

Would you have the heart to do it?

Is It R...

A funny Google Guess . . .

Well . . . is it?

Bullseye

Troubled

I was looking for a card the other day and saw this one mixed in them:

Nothing says you're sorry like someone else's words . . .

Come on, guys (because I'm assuming mostly men are buying these cards) stop screwing up in the first place.  Being in a relationship isn't that hard.  (And no, I wasn't looking for a card like this when I saw it.)

Beta Testers Needed!

Beta Testers needed!

I mentioned not too long ago that I was working on a top-secret website project.  I’m almost ready to go live with it, but I’m looking for some beta testers.  I have one already, the awesome blogger over @ colorful rants … . 

Here’s the pitch from the site’s home page (still under construction). 

http://www.blogtreader.com/

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“Blog Treader is an exciting, upstart community where bloggers can promote their sites for free!  The goal is to bring you more readers without the cost of traditional advertising.  How?  It's quite simple!

See that blue, rounded box in the sidebar?  That's your ticket to promoting your blog on a growing number of other members' blogs!  All you have to do is put that gadget in your own sidebar and in return, your badge gets put into the mix to be randomly displayed on every other gadget!

So for example, if there were 100 members, your blog badge (basically your ad) would be displayed on 100 different blogs.  (Remember, it didn't cost you a thing, either!)  Now if there were 1,000 members . . . the sky's the limit!”

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If you’re cool and you want to try it, I’ll even make you a special color-schemed gadget for your website.  (Check out the one I made for Dry Humor Daily.)  Just email me @ s.cole.garrett@gmail.com and I’ll add your badge and hook you up with your specialized gadget code for your blog.  Even if you don’t have a badge, I can help you out with that, too. 

Thanks everyone!

Jam Packed Monday

Sorry, no post today.   I've been working very diligently on my other website.  It's top secret right now, but it's taking my idea for The Blog Quilt to a whole new level!  I've had this website concept floating around in my head for a while, but it was still missing something.  I finally cracked it!

Look for tomorrow's post!

New Starbucks Logo

New Starbucks Logo


For its 40th birthday, Starbucks revealed that it will be changing its ubiquitous logo:

I worked for Starbucks for about 3 of those 40 years, so for what it's worth, I approve.  I like where this is going.  (Although, I also have to say.  I'm glad they made the freaky double mermaid less obvious but I personally think they should add the . . . um . . . lady parts back in.  Now the hair's in the way.  Just kidding.  Kind of.)

So my random mind got to thinking: what if when we all turned 40, we could change our logos, our names?  What would you change your name to?  Something famous?  Something obscure?  How about Ronald McDonald?  William Clinton?  How about Bree Van De Camp?  Coco Chanel?

Or would you have more of a sense of humor and change your "logo" to something like Richard Banger or Jenny Tull.  Just curious...

Freeeeeeeeee!!!

Freeeeeeeeee!!!


Why didn't I post yesterday?  It's because I was busy unlocking my iPhone.  Yes!!!

I used to have AT&T and an iPhone that someone gave to me.  I eventually dropped my AT&T service, but continued to use the phone as a glorified iPod.  It has been working great for a long time.  I have T-Mobile, now, which the iPhone can be unlocked for, but I never tried to unlock my iPhone because I didn't want to jack it up.  (After all, it was making perfectly good music while I wrote Dry Humor Daily.  Why would I want to?)  

Anyway, I was updating the firmware on the iPhone in order to use some wireless headphones I purchased.  Bad move!  iTunes forgot to mention that when you restore your iPhone in order to update the firmware, you have to reactivate it with AT&T!  (In other words, I couldn't even use it to play music any more...)  My reaction was something like this:

"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Son of a . . . . ."

"Gah!"

*Long sigh*

Then it occurred to me that I officially had nothing to lose by risking jailbreaking my device.  So I did some extensive reading and decided on a method on how to do it and got to work.  And voila!  Music and the ability to text like white lightning!  I'm in a happy place, now.  :)

High Priority

High Priority


News flash!  Celebrities sell!  (Quite a revelation for the day, huh?)  And sometimes, the terrible celebrity news stories beat out real, very relevant news.  It makes me laugh and metaphorically cry in the same sitting.

One of my favorite news sources is msn.com, not because of it's articulate quality, but because I find the best examples of what I'm talking about.  (Actually, I hate reading the articles on MSN.com because it's a maze to find them.  You click on the pretty headliner picture and you get taken to Marie Claire's dating advice, or worse . . . bing!)  To illustrate the lop-sided msn-scale-of-importance, I captured this screen shot yesterday:

First of all, political kids are no more news-worthy than my kids or your kids.  Second, who cares?  Sadly enough, people click on this article, read this article, tell their friends about this article, and read the subsequently-linked wonder wall about this article, and completely miss the one about the cure for HIV.  (Claimed, but not yet proven, that is.)  

I take a very neutral stance about finding a cure for HIV and AIDS, but I do think even the slightest hint of a cure is more worth reading than another review of Chelsea Clinton's wedding.  I appreciate news stations and sites that report on important topics, not Lindsey Lohan's rehab.  Maybe I'm just a little old school.  Please, MSN, if I'm going to be forced through your site on a daily basis in some way or another, at least give me an article worth my time.  (Seriously, please.)

Ode to The Pillow

Ode to The Pillow

Oh, the comforting softness of the perfect pillow!

Few things on this Earth compare to the tranquil embrace of a bed pillow.  Its gentle cushion eases restless and wandering minds.  It selflessly bears the weight of burdened thoughts.  The pillow is both an open forum and a safeguard of deep secrets.  Even the sweetest of dreams rest in the very same place.  

Reality, however, cannot be forgotten even upon these cozy sanctuaries.  Dark nightmares are never further than a minute brain function away.  They lurk dreadfully and immeasurably close to one’s most comforting memories.  The catalyst for that synapse . . . ?

. . .

. . . . . . Fear.

The cure?  An easy mind.

The irony?  It is a luxury buried in a pillow.  A perfect pillow.  A treasure as rare as true love, the perfect pillow not only aids in rest or sleep, but in restful, life-altering sleep.  Find yours.  Conquer your dreams.

Caring

Believe it or not, a reader actually sent me an email asking about why there was not a post, today.  I have to be honest.  It felt pretty good to be missed.  (That's not why I didn't post.  This isn't a test or anything.)  Work just keeps getting busier and busier.  What that means for writing Dry Humor Daily is that I simply have less time at the end of the day to do so.  It really is sad, too, because I have really grown to love writing this blog.

Rest assured, I'm writing tomorrow's post in about 38 seconds from now.  :)

More Likely

More Likely

Guess what.  Children who are overweight are 75% more likely to be overweight as adults.  Know how I know?  The news told me (which means you can take that to the bank!). You see, someone did a “study” on it.  Well, I’ve got 2 cents for them:

#1 First of all . . . really?  They needed a study to find that out?  I’m trying to tread lightly, here, but that study is kind of like saying that people who drive a car are 75% more likely to get where they’re going faster than walking.  People who eat beans for lunch are 75% more likely to have a noisier afternoon than those who don’t.  People who own cats are 75% more likely to have cat fur on their furniture.  My point is: duh.

#2 Who cares?  Can’t they find something more relevant to talk about on the evening news?  How about world events or politics?  How about the economy?  Extend the weather section of the news, for Pete’s sake.  Oh, well.  I guess if this study is the only thing we all have to worry about at the moment, we’re doing alright as a society.

#3 Surely, someone had to spend money on conducting this study.  I feel like that money could be better spent curing cancer, feeding the homeless, or, let’s see, maybe improving defensive driving videos or something.

I could say more, but then I would be getting into topics not involving evening news studies.  Got any more “duh” studies you’ve heard of?  Please share!  J

I Wonder . . .

I Wonder . . .

We all want the world to be a better place, right?  Sure we do.  So how do we get there?  Ask this one question:  “Why?”

Yep.  It’s that simple.  (Not to be confused with easy).  There’s always a better way to do things, but how will we ever know if we’re not actively seeking them.  Well, like a 3 year old, I ask “why” all the time.  However, I’m not exactly wondering about a better way to split an atom.  I like to think I wonder about more practical subjects.

I’ve been collecting a list of wonderings and now I think I’ve got a post’s worth:

-Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?  (Or goldfish crackers, for that matter?)  (Or Teddy Grahams?)

-Why does sour cream have an expiration date?

-Why is a doctor’s business called their “practice?”  (I don’t know about you, but I don’t know if I like being practiced on.)

-Who decided the order of the alphabet?  And why isn’t Q at the reject end of it with X, Y, and Z?  (It’s kind of out-of-place where it is, now.)

-Why do they put Braille on drive-thru ATMs?

-Why don’t they call non-stop flights one-stop flights?

Anything y’all wonder about?