Double Dose

Cursed daylight savings!!!

Yesterday morning, I was very tired.  It wasn't because I went to bed particularly late.  It was because my alarm has been going off particularly early.  Why?  Daylight-freaking-savings.  Grrrrr!!!!  Here's what happened when I got to work:

I put my stuff down at my desk.  Next, I considered the unpredictable coffee already in the coffee pot at work.  Then, I considered the highly predictable Starbucks Via instant coffee in my desk drawer.  Any guesses which won?

Via.

So I grabbed my trusty mug, added some via, some splenda, some cream, AND . . .

---Side note---
Normally, one would add piping hot water to make instant coffee.  Well, due to my gross lack of sleep and unusual morning grogginess, I grabbed the coffee pitcher (instead of the hot water) and went to town on my beautifully prepared instant coffee mixings.

Also normally, one would notice when they perform a regular task in an irregular way.  Not me.  Not yesterday.
---End side note---

So I sit back down and begin reading my emails.  The coffee smelled particularly strong, but I took no note.  As soon as I thought my coffee would be cool enough no longer burn the very buds from my tongue, I took a sip . . . bad move.

Have you ever been in one of those situations where you drink something really really bad and you have to spit it out like you see on TV?  Or spew because you drink something and someone makes you laugh?  Today was one of those days.  I nearly spewed my coffee EVERYWHERE!  Why?  Because instant coffee made with coffee tastes like monkey bung hole!  (That's just speculation, by the way.)

Note to self:  Don't make instant coffee with actual coffee.
Note to readers:  Don't make instant coffee with actual coffee.  It's putrid.

Trenta

Trenta


What kind of former Starbucks employee would I be if I didn't bring up the "trenta."  (The what-a?)  Trenta.  (Ah, okay.)  Trenta is the latest addition to Starbucks' beverage size offerings.  Behold!

That bad boy on the left there is the Trenta, sized up against the now-paltry Venti.  It doesn't look all that different, right?  It is.  You see, I still have many friends who work there and I got lay eyes on one on Monday, the night before its big debut.  Here's how it went:

Friend:   Hey, Cole, have you heard about the Trenta, yet?

Me:       Yeah, they were testing it in very select markets about a year ago before I left.  Why?

Friend:   Starts tomorrow.  Check it out.  (Friend scuttles to the back and returns with the new cup and hands it to me.)

Me:       Hmm.  (I carefully wrapped my hand and my brain around the wholly American idea of a fifth drink size option.)  Well, it doesn't look that big.

Friend:   Yeah, but look at the Venti.  (No scuttling to the back for this one.  He placed one on the counter less impressively.)

Me:        Oh . . . 

Friend:   Yeah . . .

Me:        Oh my . . .

Friend:   Yeah . . .

Talk about lions, tigers, and bears.  The new Trenta size is obscenely large, 31 ounces to be exact.  Starbucks has been historically good at listening to their consumers' wants and needs, but I think this brushes awfully close to socially and corporately irresponsible.  The only reason it doesn't cross the line is because supposedly, you can only get it filled with iced tea or iced coffee.  But let's face it, people will be asking for the forbidden trenta-sized frappuccinos . . . low-fat of course.  :)

Tuesday 8/10

Coffee Flow

You kill it, you fill it.  That’s the unwritten law, at least.  (You know, someone should really write all those down.)  In Boy Scout camp, that meant you had to go get back in line and painstakingly wait for more lemonade while the other kids ate your seconds.  At home, that meant you had to refill the water jug in the refrigerator while your friends un-paused the video game you were all playing as they kill off your idle, helpless player in your absence.  In the office world, that means you have to put more paper in the printer.  You would do it for yourself, right?

When it comes to coffee, you don’t want to mess around, especially first thing in the morning.  If you take the last cup in the office at 7:31 in the morning, you better plan on filling that bad boy back up!  It’s bad karma if you don’t.  Here is a helpful chart to decide when to make more coffee: